Saturday, October 6, 2012

Breathe


So remember when I said that I was struggling with an unknown illness last week? What was masquerading as some sort of flu bug appears to be a simple case of utter physical exhaustion. Between caring for my three daughters, home schooling, cleaning, cooking, running errands, blogging, and sewing -- and all on six hours of sleep or (often) less per night -- I have discovered that my rope does indeed have an end to it. It appears that something is going to have to give, and that "something" will probably be a bit of my sewing and blogging.

I have always been the sort of person who throws herself completely into things, and once in a while I throw myself a little further in than I should. It's the perfectionist in me. Sewing has been such a joy for me, but the more I do, the more I want to do, and it's amazing how fast it all piles up. There are always at least ten events happening at any time online, and I want to join every one of them. Before I know it, I'm scrambling every night to finish another project, another blog post. And then there are all the blog posts that I need to read before bed so that I don't have ninety messages waiting for me in Google Reader the next morning. Meanwhile I struggle to give my family the love and attention that they need and keep up with the endless piles of laundry and dishes -- well, you get the idea. It's all about priorities, and I'm starting to get the feeling that I've mixed something up somewhere.

My sudden crash this week has been a wake up call for me. Reading Katie's post last night was another nudge in that direction. And then my father surprised me by sitting down with me as an ambassador for the family this afternoon and saying, "We love you and we're proud of you, but you're doing too much." As hard as it is for me to admit it, he's right. And just to make sure that I don't weasel out of it, I want to let all of you know it too. I'll still be sewing and blogging here every week, just a little less often. You have all been such a blessing to me this year -- more than you will ever know. I love sewing and sharing with you, but I've found that I really do need to slow down and take time to breathe.

After talking with my dad for a while, I went downstairs to find the rest of the family. I hugged my husband. I played with my dogs. I taught my girls how to make gingerbread.

It was the best afternoon I've spent in a long time.

14 comments:

  1. DO take care! Your family's not the only ones that care about you! ;-)

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  2. Very important Heidi. I did all that when my kids were young ( no blogging then ) and u burnt myself out. It was 10 months of flu like symptoms. Better to slow down now, then have to quit everything !

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  3. Heidi, I so admire you for having the clarity to see where the things are and being willing to change them. I know how it is to want to do just one extra project, one more blog post,.... and ending up being completely out of balance and exhausted. You're in my thoughts!

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  4. Breathe, perfect! Enjoy the real world, so glad you could see the need for you...and pop in when you WANT to...or don't, LOL, I think we achieve being the best of who we are by simply knowing when we need a change. Congrats for seeing it!

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  5. Aren't Dads awesome. They have a way of just beig dad, no matter how old we get. Enjoy your young family, while you can. I know from my own experience, they grow up and move on WAY too fast. (I didn't believe that years ago, when people said it. I do now!)

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  6. Enjoy where you are right now. The rest will come eventually. Take care of you.

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  7. Family is definitely the most important thing, so don't worry the quilting blogging community will always be here for you. We love your work, so just sew and blog when you can. Remember quilting is so suppose to relax and calm you not the other way around:)

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  9. Keep well. Put yourself first - go slowly and remember,
    'The people who matter don't mind and the people who mind don't matter'.
    Sending you love and hugs and positive vibes across the internet super-highway.
    xx

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  10. Oh, Heidi, how I can so relate to this post! While the blogging world can be a wonderful source of community and inspiration, it can also be a lot to keep up with. I so agree with your thoughts about prioritizing, and need to remind myself of the same. My main quilt goal for 2012 was to do a Swoon quilt...it's October and I have yet to start it! I keep redirecting my attention to other projects that have time sensitive deadlines...this is a new part of sewing that I'm not used to! I've enjoyed my other projects, but I keep wondering when ill find time to do relaxing sewing. Here's hoping we can all keep things in balance!

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  11. Girl, you know I can relate. Never have I wished for "just a few more hours in the day." There literally are not enough hours in the day for us moms.

    And I find with homeschooling, I've had to sacrifice even more time. I'm giving my precious time until it hurts!

    I'm hoping you find some rest and can enjoy your family. You will have plenty of support here. We are always here.

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  12. Take care of yourself! Good for you for recognizing that you need a change. Trust me when I say that watching QALs and such are pretty fun even without participating! :) Also, your dad sounds great. :)

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  13. Oh, yes, do take care of yourself! I totally understand where you are coming from... I've got two girls and they are a little older now but I'm still as busy and my sink is always full. Gotta take care of yourself first :o) it's hard to do when you're MOM. btw I love your ornament quilt from the quilt along.

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  14. So glad you are taking time for you and your family--so important! I totally understand, this world continues on and you don't want to miss a single thing, those little ones grow up so fast! And there will always be more blog posts to write, more patterns to sew and more QAL's and you will be able to enjoy it more knowing you are feeling great and your family is taken care of, and we will be here supporting you and loving your projects

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Aren't you the sweetest!! Thanks for making my day by leaving a comment!

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